Every girl in the streets today is dying to have herself a fantasy wedding-gorgeous hair, nice dress, shoes, impeccable make up and a prince charming to cap it all up. If you’ve noticed what I notice, seems as if the fantasies mock the reality. If wishes were horses, some wedding planning outfits will damn all competitions and shut down for a while, why? They can’t cope with increasing demands of clients. Did you also know that ladies plan their weddings these days in faith? Whatever works for you though.
Now my question is, why is it that in the midst of all these plans and fantasies, more ladies in the diaspora are not having a physical share of their dreams? Maybe it’s not as bad as we see it, but unfortunately or otherwise, the African culture has defined the woman, and no matter how much we globalize, these definitions are somewhere in your head telling you things you don’t want to hear but will definitely hear from someone else. Movies glorify the ‘hopeless romantic’ characters who eventually have their Cinderella/Rapunzel story. Well WAKE UP! Life is no fairy tale or rather doesn’t happen that way all the time. The real deal is what you get at the end of the day.
Why in the world are African sisters in diaspora, who supposedly should fancy the ‘miss independent concept’ seriously searching for their lost ‘mother ribs’? It’s now very easy to come across ladies who think and are actually working towards nailing that marriage with a white or black man abroad. Reason being that the mentality of the men abroad would not be as crude as those of the “undiluted” African folks. I’m not sure how true this is but either way, ladies in diaspora are still searching and very serious about it. Below are possible reasons why the search is now more intense:
1. The Declining Status Of Marriage In The West
First off, the environment they are in does not prioritize marriage, worse of all, in a generation like ours where people are busy chasing and throwing back at life. Everyone is always on the move, chasing something I suppose. The divorce rate of the western world has trivialized the very essence of marriage and all that it stands for. Some actually divorce, and refuse to remarry or try anything in that neighborhood again; some others are traumatized or too scared to try what seems to be a constantly broken record. To a great extent, marriage has lost its core values in the west, and just because you are an African lady with a different background does not change the reality of the environment.