If you have ever bought something, only to return home and discover that it does not actually work as promised, you should be acquainted with the harm that even a little lie, whether from someone you know or a stranger, can do.
It becomes tricky, however, to outrightly verify if a person is lying before the negative fallout of that lie occurs. So would it not be handy to have some tips that could help you spot out a lie, admittedly not with 100 percent accuracy, while still maintaining your relationship with other individuals.
An FBI special Agent Jack Schafer who specializes in behavior analysis and should, therefore, know a bit about spotting a lie has offered three tips that you may find helpful in spotting a lie.
Techniques for spotting a lie;
Dwelling in the Land of Is
According to Schafer, the land of is occupies the space between truth and deception; it is a land full of half-truths, innuendos, suppositions, assumptions, and verbal judo. Here you will have people going to great lengths to contort language to fit the version of truth they are trying to sell.
To test people for the truth, simply ask them a yes or no question. Should they fail to answer yes or no, you should already be suspicious but after they have provided a convoluted answer to the direct question, ask the same question again. If the person once again fails to answer with a yes or no, the probability of deception increases significantly.
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Beginning an answer with ‘well…’
Schafer again insists on the fact that a yes or no question demands a yes or no answer. He says that if you ask someone a direct yes or no question, and the response you get begins with the word ‘Well,” there is a high probability of deception.
When a person answering a direct question begins that way there is a high probability that the person is about to give an answer that he or she knows the questioner is not expecting.
Their answer to the question; why should I believe you?
Finally, Schafer points out that when truthful people are asked why others should believe them, they typically answer, “Because I’m telling the truth” or something along those lines.
Someone lying, on the other hand, is more likely to go on the defensive and reply along the lines of; “You don’t have to believe me if you don’t want to”, “So you think I’m lying” and others like that.
Although it is helpful to remember that these tips are not foolproof, they do help you preserve relationships while fishing for greater detail and understanding of a person’s answer.