Family Relationships are the most sensitive of all relationships. Why? Maybe because they are a part and parcel of you. And the thinner the bond is the more strife there is within the individual and the home at large.
The family is the smallest and the most important unit of the society. So, logically, if you get it right within the family, you might as well have a lesser struggle making it in the outer bigger world.
Family relationships just like life itself can go bad or good given the circumstance at the time. But for what it is worth, family relationships are expected to be handled with the utmost maturity.
Here are some of the poisons that ruin family relationships:
By words, actions and defiance, insults come in to strain family relationships both nuclear and extended. When people feel comfortable to disregard each other and their very essence, it shows there was no respect for each other in the first place.
2. Criticisms & Comparisons:
You know that awkward moment when you feel justified to criticize? (and often not constructive enough)… Take a break and think about it because the next thing that comes into play is comparing your family members with another person – be it family, friend, an acquaintance or even a stranger.
It really does not feel cool knowing you are constantly being weighed by the life of someone else. Everybody has an individual struggle and story that none other than themselves know. Sometimes it pays to give each other the benefit of the doubt.
What’s best? Accepting them for who they are.
The more we try to understand and respect each other, the lesser need there is for aimless criticisms.
Perhaps it’s correct to say that everyone gossips about everyone. But you only admit it is wrong when the gossip mongers in question are not people close to you. It would be nice if the gossip is substituted with a healthy chat with the topic of the gossip present. That way the cause of the gossip is tackled and addressed.
Gossip is one straight way of damaging people’s personalities; betrayal; and divulging people’s secrets either for fun or just to hurt them by throwing it all out in the open.
Family should be one. When there are traits of taking sides to spite the other, then there is a fundamental problem with that family. And then the whole essence of being family is lost.
5. Having Your Way No Matter What:
Family is best described with the unity in diversity concept. The beauty of individuality is when it collectively creates a vibrant and colorful community. When a person’s utmost concern is his personal gratification, then a crack is just around the corner.
It is a one-sided family relationship if your individual happiness is all that counts.
Being insensitive in a family circle is one the worst relationship poisons of all times. When people hurt or are going through a rough patch in their lives, it is expected that close pals show some level of concern. Imagine what it feels like if family is not found in the circle of your well wishers.
It is insensitive to introduce a conversation on a billion dollar adventure you are embarking on in a gathering of unemployed brothers and sisters; except preferably you’ve got slots for them. Insensitivity is one door away from being wicked.
7. Dishonesty (Lies):
Nothing diminishes trust faster than lies and deception. If we call them family, then they deserve to know the truth at all times.
Of what use is family if we can’t fall back on them and count on them for support? Of what use is family if members cannot be there for each other?
9. No Apologies:
It is a natural law that you apologize when you offend someone. Sometimes this expectation is overlooked “because it’s family”. In cases where there are liberal minds, it is almost easy for some family members to get away with what they’ve done knowing very well they hurt someone’s feelings.
10. No Forgiveness:
As stupid as it makes you feel, make room for forgiveness. As undeserving as it seems the offender is of your forgiveness, do it anyway. Unforgiveness is the highest of all poisons that threaten family relationships.
It’s not always about being right. Make the decision and go the mile, one step at a time.
In the end, love is all that matters